Holiday fireworks from Disney

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Happy Holidays!

SF Muni CultureBus

∇ Category:Art, Events and Culture, Travel | → 1 Comments |

San Francisco Muni now offers a bus service the exclusively brings people to and from museums within SF. The new line is called the 74X CultureBus. It started this past weekend (Sept. 20, 2008) and runs daily departing about every 20 minutes. It does however cost more money than a standard Muni ride ($7 for adults or an additional $3 for monthly Fast Pass customers).

http://www.sfculturebus.org/
The link to the route on their home page is broken so use this one:
http://www.sfculturebus.org/route.htm

Returned from Texas yesterday…

∇ Category:Epicurean Delights, Humor, Travel | → 0 Comments |

My lord I would be really fat if I lived in Texas! The food there is all so damn rich. I must say I really did enjoy the BBQ, I think all lunch places should serve bbq with women in hot pants and zipper tops. Mmm tasty! Continuing with the culinary experience, I even ate fried Gator tail! Now that was scrumptious; it is similar to fried calamari except less chewy and without the fear of potentially eating Cthulhu’s baby and being damn to potentially stay in Dallas for the rest of my life (a personal fear). So even though I found it quite easy to get inebriated finding a decent bar proved to be difficult even in a city the boasts it has more bars than any other city.

Leaving Texas proved to be very difficult. First, I woke up still drunk. Not a good sign, then I proceeded to the airport to go through all the normal lines and headaches as I am starting to get my hangover. Now with 4 hours of sleep under my belt, the thought of going home keeps me going. As it comes to boarding time, THE announcement comes, there is a mechanic issue with the plain and the flight will be delayed. “Anyone with a transfer please come to the desk and we will TRY to accommodate you.” By when the lady said we, she meant the “Royal We”, as in after 45 minutes on line, she completed only 4 people’s tickets. Thankfully I was like 9th in line but I need to be home for a 3 pm meeting. It is already 9:30am Central time and with a layover almost guaranteed, it just did not look good for our heroes. After an hour and fifteen minutes a second attendant showed up to help. In the mean time I try calling united and they do put me on a flight that will get me in about 2pm but I still need to wait on line for ticketing and everything else… useless… So when I finally get up to the counter… I great the new guy with a big smile and ask him how his day was going. Then I explained to him that I need to get to either SFO or Oakland before 2pm PST. He put on a different carrier, American, and told me I needed to change terminals. Well I that was a process within itself…” I ended up walking 1/2 mile with all my bags and standing on line for tickets once again. I then get to the desk and ask for exit row seat, if not then an isle seat. She said that there was an exit row available and an isle seat. So I took the exit row. Then I went on line for security, again. It took me 35 minutes to get to the point in which I got to be scanned and such. Ok, now I have been standing on lines or walk from one line to another since 8 am. It is now 11am. And I am a potential terrorist risk.

The TSA guy pulls me aside. Scans me with a wand and every time it touches me it goes off. He then proceeds to pat me down. Moving next to my luggage, he opens up everything and asks detailed questions about my electronics… Thankfully I did not have the Peter North 10″ Vibrating dildo that Amy got me for my birthday! I am sure that would have been considered a deadly weapon, anyway he swabs things for explosives and goes through my dirty cloths. He eventually found CONTRABAND! I apparently smuggled a small lighter, the mini size deep inside my overnight bag. He thoroughly explained the regulations in a way only a government official could and then offered to allow me to mail it to myself. Which, I did not want to point out would also be illegal due to the fact that you can’t put compressed, flammable liquids in the mail. So I decided to just let it go. He did write up a report on how I had such a thing so I am pretty sure I am on a watch list from now on. I did finally get on the plane! To my middle row seat next to a 6’4” guy… wait there is something fishy about this, beyond the fact that I was one of last to board and was sitting in row 8 on my $1200 ticket, there was no exit at the end of this row. Nope, I am now in a middle seat, in a cramped row and there is no place to put my carry-on bags. Oh the humanity. So I go into first class and put my bags there to the scowling looks of those people who probably all paid less for their ticket, and then went to my center seat. The only saving grace was that the closed the door before the person to my right could board so I was able to put some space between us.

After landing I spent several hours of running around and dealing with all the shit I did not do before I left. I was able to have a playful evening reveling in the fact that I was in my own bed and probably breaking at least 30 obscenity laws if I was still in Texas. (Thanks for the warm welcome…) God do I love San Francisco!